The Struggle Within Me

This passage of the Bible resonates so deep within me today. I was doubting a decision I had already made.  Struggling within myself…..

As followers of Christ we still have to live with the struggle of sin within ourselves and others. Life still has struggles to face or we would not learn to ask for God’s help and direction. The bold part below reminds me of my struggle and encourages me to change for the better!

Again, I’m not changing on my own. I have felt very recently like my life didn’t have direction or I was never good enough for xyz. Frustration infused my life. I was frantic in all things. Until I started to ask God for that direction and guidance. Help me, show me, direct my comings and going every day!

Once anyone does this in their life it is so freeing and exciting!!! Yes, it’s so very easy to fall back in the trap of self doubt; the part of yourself that wants to say you can’t or wants to help God along.  It’s SCARY to trust, but this is when you say I’m stepping out in faith. You asked me to do this and I am so scared and feeling inadequate, but I choose to trust in You!

I would rather trust in Him than be a frantic mess. God cares so much about everyone’s everyday! Will you take the time to ask him about it and check back in with Him to listen?

Yes, many times I don’t listen and then hopefully I am watching close enough to see what God is teaching me through life’s everyday moments. It’s hard to change, but easier to do with God’s help. I desire to be thankful and full of the grace bestowed to me through Jesus.

Romans 7:14-25 MSG

“I can anticipate the response that is coming: “I know that all God’s commands are spiritual, but I’m not. Isn’t this also your experience?” Yes. I’m full of myself—after all, I’ve spent a long time in sin’s prison. What I don’t understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise.

So if I can’t be trusted to figure out what is best for myself and then do it, it becomes obvious that God’s command is necessary. But I need something more! For if I know the law but still can’t keep it, and if the power of sin within me keeps sabotaging my best intentions, I obviously need help!

I realize that I don’t have what it takes.

I can will it, but I can’t do it. I decide to do good, but I don’t really do it; I decide not to do bad, but then I do it anyway. My decisions, such as they are, don’t result in actions. Something has gone wrong deep within me and gets the better of me every time. It happens so regularly that it’s predictable. The moment I decide to do good, sin is there to trip me up. I truly delight in God’s commands, but it’s pretty obvious that not all of me joins in that delight.

Parts of me covertly rebel, and just when I least expect it, they take charge. I’ve tried everything and nothing helps. I’m at the end of my rope. Is there no one who can do anything for me? Isn’t that the real question?

The answer, thank God, is that Jesus Christ can and does. He acted to set things right in this life of contradictions where I want to serve God with all my heart and mind, but am pulled by the influence of sin to do something totally different.”


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